trials, tribulations

the visa saga has an update. on monday, i went to the visa application center in vancouver operated by "worldbridge" (aka WB = worthless bottomfeeders): the entirely useless service that the british are using to process visas in canada (and a bunch of other countries). and when i say useless. i mean it. the british high commission has nothing to do with you until you've met with WB, been fingerprinted and had them essentially spellcheck your application. (i honestly can't see what value they added to my application -- they checked off that my address was correct and told me i needed supplemental materials, but didn't know what those supplemental materials were). wow. gee thanks. i don't know my own address and, having perused your website about 15,000 times i can tell you that "it's not all on there" and the "frequently-asked questions" section doesn't even begin to cover the half of my questions. i bet mine were frequently asked (and met with blank, cow-like stares). but i digress.

anyway, after WB looks at your application for a hot 15 minutes, gives you electronic fingerprints (though i kind of was looking forward to smudgy ink fingers, leading stranger to wonder what i'd been "booked" for) and pushes you out the door less informed than you were when you walked in, you have to submit your application package to the high commission in ottawa ON YOUR OWN. yes, WB doesn't even do that much. i couriered it and checked that it arrived. it did. at 9:35 am the next day.

so we're off to the races then.

i have a huge knot in my stomach - i'm anxious that the bank letter from citi isn't going to be the ridiculous information they wanted in the ridiculous way they wanted it. that's the number one reason people are rejected. i explained all i could in a cover letter, so i hope for the best.

on a lighter note:

i've been watching 24/7 indian programming. not quite 24/7 but close. one notable game show that airs on sony entertainment asia: "10 ka dum" ("the power of 10"),

"10 ka dum" is hosted by salman khan, a bollywood actor who has lately been on the decline. the show, however, is a raging success. and has led sony entertainment asia to a third-place ranking in the indian television media circus.

in round one, two competitors or teams face off to guess the percentage (closest wins) of indians surveyed (by an IPSO polling service in india) on a series of questions. winner of the first round goes on to (surprise!) the second round, where they face a series of similar questions. instead of coming closest to the correct percentage of indians surveyed, they have to give an answer within a percent range and the correct answer must fall within that range guessed. like "who wants to be a millionaire" you can always walk away and take your earlier winnings. as the value of the questions increases, the range within which your answer must be to be correct narrows. For Rs. 10,000 (about $204.60 USD), you must be correct within a range of 40%, For Rs. 1,00,000 (about $2,460), within 30%; For Rs. 10,00,000 (about $20,460), within 20%; For Rs. 1,00,00,000 ($204,600), within 10% and for the final prize of Rs. 10,00,00,000 ($2,046,000), you have to give the exact percentage.

* india seems to be the only country which uses different numerical separators. weirdos.

the notable thing about the show is the questions they ask! hilarious. last time i was watching they asked:

"what percentage of indian women surveyed said that they had hit their husband with a rolling pin?"

"what percentage of indian men surveyed said that they loosen the button of their trousers before they sit down to a meal?"

"what percentage of indian men surveyed say they bring their wives tea in bed?"

"what percentage of indian men surveyed say that they have used the ladies room?"

"what percentage of indian people surveyed think the story of their romance would make a blockbuster bollywood movie?"

etc, etc. you get the gist. hilarious!!

today's contestants were a trans-sexual versus a male-model a la zoolander. where do they find these people? oh yeah, there are 1 billion to choose from.

amazing.